I hear what you're saying. I don't see the methods you listed working under our government as our system has this flaw where the laws enforced tend to depend on which party is in charge.
That being said, organize your workplace. I'm personally fond of the Industrial Workers of the World as we are the only union that has an anticapitalist stance and our industrial organizing methods make it harder for employers to create division amongst the workers of a workplace (ie: separate unions for school teachers and school maintenance staff).
"We were just thinking of the shareholders." You can't just pass the blame to shareholders. Why do shareholders exist? To create the illusion that everyone can be an "owner" so that the owning class can continue to fuck us all.
I feel you. I find them more of a hassle than anything. I could go on for a bit on why they're annoying and you're better off using another method to stay dry. None of them are "don't use an umbrella because that's gay" though as I'm not an emotionally immature middle school boy that doesn't get enough attention at home.
For me it's between refusing to use an umbrella because "it's gay" or refusing to sit in the middle seat of a work truck because of the same reason as the first.
You skipped over the part where he says "You think I own this business? You think I own IKEA?" implying he would care if he actually had any skin in the game which he would if his job operated as a worker co-op.
I thought it was the Curse of Goblin that sunk that land?