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LadyAutumn

@ LadyAutumn @lemmy.blahaj.zone

Posts
22
Comments
556
Joined
2 yr. ago

Trans woman - 10 years HRT

Intersectional feminist

Queer anarchist

  • FBI Readies New War on Trans People

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  • We have to. If we yield then there's no one standing up for trans children. As tempting as escape is, we cannot abandon them. We cannot abandon ourselves and our community. I'm sorry. I wish it wasnt this way, dearly.

    As deranged as it may be to take comfort in a quote from a fantasy book, a quote from lord of the rings brings me some degree of comfort.

    So do all who live to see such times, but that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.

    Getting bogged down in wishes to be in a different world can stop us from making this world better. We can't change what's already happened, all we can do is take actions now.

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  • Copyright is mind numbingly stupid.

  • An appreciation of past accomplishments

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  • I really like the way you reframed things. I also experienced repeated setbacks to getting bottom surgery, I know how devastating it is. Taking the time to shift your focus to areas of your life that do make you happy is really important.

  • Texas A&M University Removes Dean After Viral Video Depicting Trans-Inclusive Education

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  • A dean being fired over the gender unicorn. What a time to be alive.

  • Which stage are you at?

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  • Hey, I have a real job!

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  • he/they transfem.. not too common?

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  • I dont really have anything else to add that other people haven't already. I just wanted to say that everyone is welcome in this community regardless of the pronouns they use. If transfem feels like a label that applies, even partially, then this community was made to be a safe space for you.

    Also, we as a gender diverse people don't have an obligation to explain why we prefer the terms we do to other people. You dont have to justify using the pronouns you do here. Like if someone in an unrelated thread asked you why you use he/they and identify as transfem, in a gatekeeping way, we would take moderator action against them.

  • [Rant] I'm not* trans, but I am angry

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  • You are absolutely welcome to post here. :)

    I appreciate the sentiment you're expressing here. I work over the phone and get misgendered pretty well round the clock every day. I even give my pronouns as part of my opening, like "Thank you for calling, this is LadyAutumn speaking, my pronouns are she/her, how can I help?" My voice does not pass though so like. ~90% of the time I get misgendered anyway. It's nice when I'm practicing my voice and do get gendered correctly more often, but its a lot of work to maintain that and I have long struggled with vocal training.

    Its hard to explain to people the mental toll of being misgendered for 9 hours a day every working day. It makes you dissociate a lot. I usually dont bother correcting people unless they seem intent on misgendering me every single sentence. But, yeah. It wears you down. It messes with your confidence a lot. Like sometimes I look in the mirror after and it feels a little weird remembering oh yeah I actually do like who I am and like the way I look. Like being misgendered so consistently for so long just makes my brain foggy and makes me forget all the things I do like about myself. I manage alright and take care of myself, but somedays are still pretty hard.

    People lack empathy of this experience a lot. I dont hate the people who unintentionally misgender me. I don't blame them at all for the most part. I just assume they weren't listening when I gave my pronouns or forgot or whatever. But whether its intentional or not doesn't really make a huge huge difference in how it makes me feel? It's like someone constantly calling attention to your worst insecurity that makes you feel powerfully misunderstood and uncomfortable. Thats going to hurt, whether the person doing so is doing it intentionally or not. I relate a lot to the way women with fertility issues describe feeling when asked about when theyre having kids. Like its not exactly the same feeling, but its that same thing with a really bad insecurity being called attention to by someone who is well meaning and oblivious. Doesn't really hurt any less than if they were doing so deliberately.

  • How did you settle on a name?

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  • Tried a few out before landing on my name. I went by another name for a couple months that just never really felt right. Then I found my name and every single person in my life was like "it's perfectly you". People still say that after they've known me for a while haha. I'm pretty sure I found the actual name just by scrolling through a name list. It jumped out at me right away and I was really really happy when I told my friends and they first started using the name for me.

  • Reminder for all the ladies and estrogen takers - Just like any other woman, you need to do regular self-exams of your chest

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  • I've read conflicting studies on this. Breast cancer doesnt have a single root cause, and several of the genes associated with developing breast cancer can be inherited by people who have a Y chromosome (which has been shown to significantly increase the risk). I believe current guidance after a trans woman has been on HRT for 3 years or more is to treat their risk profile as being equivalent to a cis woman with their genetics and family history.

    My mother died of stage 4 breast cancer. So did my great grandmother, and one of my aunts. Consequently I have been getting annual checks on the recommendation of my doctors.

    Studies have also shown that family history of breast cancer can and does translate to increased risk for cis men (still comparatively much lower than for cis women, but nontheless still present). Needless to say, if a first degree relation to you has had breast cancer it should be treated as a serious risk regardless of your assigned sex, its just harder to detect early if you have breast tissue. Which is why getting checked is important.

  • how do you answer "when was your last period" at the doctors?

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  • To any cis people wandering in from c/All, please review the rules of this community and consider you may not have the same first hand experiences as trans people.

    Cis people are welcome to participate here so long as they're not disrupting the safety of our community. Spreading misinformation and maintaining ignorance is not acceptable here.

    In an ideal world being transgender would be of literally no consequence. We do not live in such a world. Being trans is life or death across the vast majority of the world. The disclosure of transgender status is a massive vulnerability that is unwarranted in >90% of medical situations.

    This thread was not created with this discussion in mind. If it continues to be derailed I will lock the thread.

  • how do you answer "when was your last period" at the doctors?

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  • A few things.

    Firstly, OP specifically said "Ideally without disclosing I'm trans". Your whole comment was unnecessary first off from the outset.

    Secondly, you have grossly overstated medical necessity here. Hormonally trans women who have been on HRT are functionally much closer to cis women than cis men. Trans status is rarely relevant to any medical treatment that isn't specifically about reproductive organs.

    Thirdly, trans status is a matter of life or death in the vast majority of the world. Medical necessity, even if it were as significant as you've tried to portray it as, means nothing if you get arrested or killed.

  • High Waist Jeans are one hell of A lot better than standard "Man Jeans"

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  • I live for high waisted shorts and skirts. Also high waisted skinny jeans / jeggings? Incredible. High waist gives me such flattering hip definition. I dont wear mid/low rise very often.

  • I was working on a picture of a horse trailer for a single horse. This isn't what I asked for. It's even better.

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  • Put red LEDs in it's eyes to stare down your enemies.

  • Help with support group recommendation

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  • I'm sorry you lost access to your support group. Youre absolutely welcome to participate in this community but the culture fostered in that community is not accepted here. The language used in that community is not permitted in this community.

    This community is also explicitly supportive of all gender diverse people, including non-binary and agender people. I know that 4tran has a long history of transmedicalism and demonization of non-binary people. That is categorically unacceptable here and will result in moderator action.

    If you can abide by that, you're absolutely welcome here. This space is for all transfeminine people, and we work hard to maintain its safety and accessibility for everyone.

  • The size difference 🤣

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  • This 100%. I went down a size in like everything, but mostly cause I was just wearing stuff that fit for the first time lol

  • progesterone sources?

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  • This community is supportive of DIY, and I dont have any problem with this being asked here. I would advise any responders to send supplier links via DMs. Progesterone and estrogen aren't controlled substances, so I'm not really that concerned about people inquiring here.

  • Pete Buttigieg Says Trans Athletes in Women’s Sports Raise “Serious Fairness Issues”

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  • I think in the sense of "global elite athletics", no it by definition isn't fair. At all levels of sports funding is a significant entry barrier to elite competition. Biological advantages are everywhere too, irrespective of gender. Height, leg height, wing span, lung capacity, heart size, spinal curvature, basically every kind of biological parameter can create an advantage over someone else.

    Thats an advantage those athletes havent earned. You don't earn a biological advantage, you just have it. You don't earn being born to a wealthy family who can finance your strict comprehensive training regimen, you just are born to one. If sports is about fairness, that is to say like, a level playing field anyone can come along and work really hard and compete, then no sports is not fair. Some people will be better than others no matter how hard they work.

    Fairness in the sense of this discussion, is competition within your gender. Critics of trans inclusion are not objecting on biological grounds, they are objecting to a trans woman competing with cisgender women because they do not agree that she is a woman. These arguments about fairness are almost never applied to cis women with height or wingspan advantages. Just to trans women of any kind for competing at any level of competition.

    If fairness is the goal, then sports needs to be extensively categorized based on all the biological parameters that give you an advantage. Or else some kind of combined leaderboard where everyones advantage or handicap is accounted for. Athletics competitions for people with disabilities already implement a combined leaderboard system in this way.

    But no one is interested in actually being fair. They're interested in who does the absolute best. Who is the absolute best woman and who is the absolute best man. The disagreement is that trans women are women. There's nothing else they're concerned with precluding certain women from participating. They just disagree that trans women are women and therefore believe that in a "whos the absolute best woman at xyz" competition trans women should be excluded. To say that its a matter of fairness is demonstrably false.

    Oh, and also your comment breaks one of the rules of this community. I'm leaving it up because I think it presents an opportunity to educate on exactly why this belief is wrong. But further comments to this effect will be removed. Please follow the rules of this community.

  • Public transit in Toronto, Canada 🇨🇦 vs Chengdu, China 🇨🇳

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  • You can think whatever you like I suppose, but it helps if you provide a source.

  • Public transit in Toronto, Canada 🇨🇦 vs Chengdu, China 🇨🇳

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  • I dont think that it requires a single party system to do this. Just much more coordinated public industries and infrastructure projects where public development is prioritized.

  • Transfem @lemmy.blahaj.zone
    LadyAutumn @lemmy.blahaj.zone

    Anyone else just... never go through the legal name change process? Its been like 7 years since I came out and I still haven't bothered with it.

  • Transfem @lemmy.blahaj.zone
    LadyAutumn @lemmy.blahaj.zone

    A far right grifter is attempting to scam vulnerable trans people with fake hormone 'alternatives'. Please be wary of "QueerQuirk" and the sub brand "Estrolabs".

    www.them.us /story/bogus-estrogen-alternative-ashwagandha-pills-scam