Reason for my depression : Life sucks and I knew it, from my childhood.
I feel better: When I am too busy to think about it. For now, work and family occupies my time mostly. I smile ( = cry ) when I see same depression pattern for my kid.
Imo, you should actively change your situation ( see a doc, have a hobby etc... more importantly, find positive in even small things )
People are different. Even if 10000% perfect matches, there will be issues in between. Just give sometime.
Multiple solutions are there, like counselling. Understanding each other plays a big role. If you are parents, you gotta hell of responsibilities and less time for arguments.
Thank you for this lengthy reply !
Yes, I do have social anxiety.
I do try to break it many times but inherently it is there. Without a very good reason, I will keep it in the comfort zone ( lazyness + anxiety , I guess ).
I may need a set of friends who are not judgemental.
Sometimes I want to continue that relation. But, most times 1. I dont remember their face or parts of the talk 2. I just dont actively think about continuing ( Its like I have to put a remainder on that talk - quite dumb ? ) 3. They might be disinterested in the next time ( partly, I believe of silly way of expressing things )
I use
https://fedi-search.com/