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SoleInvictus

@ SoleInvictus @lemmy.blahaj.zone

Posts
7
Comments
362
Joined
2 yr. ago

  • I went to a grocery store in the morning that I normally go to at night and they had dimmed lights, soft music, as well as no sounds coming from the cash registers

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  • Same! Mine have a passthrough mode that pumps through what the microphone picks up but lets you select how much. I leave a little on because I feel weird if I can't hear what's happening in my surroundings.

  • I hope you do

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  • We're definitely peas in a pod. I don't really care what my diagnosis is, I just want to get more information about my inherent and learned behaviors, plus any preconceptions based on those, so I can be a better person for myself and others.

  • I hope you do

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  • That makes three of us now. Someone linked me to the RAADS-R yesterday, where I scored highly. Now I get to wonder all the same things.

    Ultimately, does a particular diagnosis or set of diagnoses matter? I'm trying to figure that out too.

  • Would you try a FOSS dating app?

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  • It claims to have 18k users. I didn't see their criteria for "active", though.

  • Deleted

    As an asexual girl who still wants a male partner, would “scheduled sex” be a dealbreaker for men?

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  • All men are people but some men are more people than others.

  • How can you protect yourself from an abusive and violent sibling when you are financially dependent on your enabling parents?

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  • I know more than I care to about POTS and what you're describing is pretty severe. Have you pursued a formal diagnosis and/or treatment? Feel free to hit me up if you haven't and want assistance there. It'll likely require some self advocacy which can be difficult, especially at first.

    You may know this already, but POTS is frequently comorbid with mast cell activation syndrome (MCAS). I have it, hence why I'm familiar with all this. If that is or may be your situation too, addressing the MCAS often helps with POTS problems.

    My family dynamic was also similar to yours, so I know how awful it can be. The chronic stress is actually what got me sick. I'm sorry you're dealing with it now. I have resources that have helped me deal with repairing all that trauma and I'd be happy to share.

    Feel free to ask anything if you have any questions!

  • In many ways, Cat is to Lion as Dog is to Bear

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  • You got it. Bears and dogs/wolves last shared a common ancestor around 55 million years ago, whereas lions and domestic cats had their ancestral split about 11M years ago.

  • Deleted

    Permanently Deleted

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  • This is a great question and speaks to your maturity and ability to introspect. Seriously, internet high five.

    Regardless of the marriage dynamic, being able to clearly and compassionately communicate thoughts and feelings is a useful skill. More than speaking clearly and concisely, communication is most effective when all involved parties are good listeners, for example by asking questions for better understanding, paraphrasing what was heard to let the speaker know they're understood, and acknowledging the underlying needs and emotions to show you care. Books I've found to be useful are "Nonviolent Communication" by Marshall Rosenberg, "Couple Skills" by Matthew McKay, and "A Couple's Guide to Communication" by John M. Gottman.

    Anecdotal: One of my good friends is in an arranged marriage and found "Love Will Follow: Making Love and Intimacy Work in Indian Couples" by Shaifali Sandhya to be helpful.

  • Why is it called "male loneliness epidemic"? Dont women feel lonely too? Wtf?

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  • And US society reinforces that behavior by shaming men for being vulnerable or showing weakness and teaching others that a crying or otherwise emotionally vulnerable man is something deserving of shame and contempt.

    A great example is online advice articles about handling relationship issues: so much advises that stoicism is the only option, otherwise your girlfriend/wife will lose their respect and attraction for you.

    I had an ex-girlfriend mock me for crying during our breakup and know many men who have encountered similar shaming treatment from other men and women. It's brutal.

  • What would be the most optimal way to have good bodily nutrition with the lowest cost per meal?

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  • For anyone lucky enough to have a WinCo foods in their area, they're the cheapest I've been able to find for bulk dry goods. You can order 20-50 pound sacks of grains, beans, flour, etc., with a pretty decent discount on top of already low prices.

  • YSK How to cook a perfect (hard) boiled egg

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  • Age is the big factor. It does two things:

    1. Eggs gradually lose water, which introduces more air into the air cell and between the membrane and the shell, making it all a bit looser as you peel.
    2. The pH increases, reducing the attraction/attachment of the boiled egg white to the membrane, which is why fresh egg shells are more likely to tear strips of white off as you peel.

    Eggs in the US can be up to 60 days old at the time of packaging, then are considered good for another 45 days. Large flats of eggs can contain eggs from multiple batches of varying age, so some eggs might be two weeks old and others two or more months.

  • YSK How to cook a perfect (hard) boiled egg

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  • Agreed, ice bath is only important for me if eggs are super fresh, which makes them harder to peel, or if I need them to stop cooking fast, like if I am making soft boiled eggs or have the sudden realization I started boiling the eggs and walked off at least five minutes ago but neglected to set a timer.

    I'm not ADHD, you're ADHD!

  • If we ever find a planet with life in it, we could never set foot on it, because the interaction of the two biologies can have unpredictable consequences

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  • I'm a microbiologist. I can speak from experience (my grad research required attempting this a few times) that entirely sterilizing anything of microbes is incredibly difficult regardless of technology level. They are tenacious little fuckers. I'll lay this out for anyone interested.

    Gotta Kill 'Em All: Most microbes are fairly easy to kill using simple physical and/or chemical means. Some are more difficult, like spore formers, bacteria that produce little personal suspension pods when conditions are rough.

    What matters is you start with huge quantities of microbes, they're everywhere, and you can't see them. All you need is one to survive to potentially reproduce into vast legions of descendants. Even NASA's protocol is about lowering the total number, thereby reducing, not eliminating, the probability of causing an issue. Miss the wrong microbe in the wrong environment and you've inoculated a planet.

    Checking Your Work: How do you verify that you successfully sterilized your tool? You might say culturing - swab it and grow that on some type(s) of media. That's NASA's protocol! It's just not very effective.

    Not all microbes grow on all media. There are an estimated one trillion microbial species on the planet and we only know how to culture less than about 0.5% of them. The rest are a mystery, largely uncharacterized*. Most sterility testing is for known microbes of consequence, not every microbe in existence.

    Microbiology is very often a science of slapping your tool or workspace and exclaiming "good enough!", not absolute precision and 100% efficacy, both of which are practically required if you want to be sure you don't inadvertently pull a "smallpox blankets from space".

    *Fun fact: Sometimes people get sick with something atypical, that doesn't get IDed through standard testing. I worked for a time identifying these pathogens via gene sequencing. There was a whole lot of "that's a new one" out there.

  • We shouldn't have to go to college in order to afford a house by 30.

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  • I found a blurb that Americans spend an average of $22/week at coffee shops. That's nearly $1200 per year!

    With a median US home price of $410,000 and a minimum FHA loan down payment of 3.5%, all you need to do it save that for twelve years and never have anything go seriously wrong in the meantime. Then you too can pay about $3300 per month for 30 years, ultimately spending nearly $900,000 for your $410,000 loan.

  • We shouldn't have to go to college in order to afford a house by 30.

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  • It took an MS for me, a BS for my partner, choosing to not adopt children, five years of saving, a minor inheritance from an unexpected death, and the housing market cratering due to the pandemic for us to be able to afford a house that we absolutely could not afford now without making 150% of our current income.

    All it took was accruing nearly $100k in combined school loan debt, plus over three times that much in mortgage debt. That's freedom debt! Murica!

  • Removed

    What are some things America has lied about in the history books but the world accepts?

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  • I tried looking it up and still have no fucking idea. Satan's Kingdom State Recreation Area?

  • Looks tasty though

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  • This brings back a memory of earlier depravity.

    As a teen, I worked at a local sub sandwich joint. It wasn't uncommon to get requests for mayonnaise and these sandwiches got a bit on the top bun. Requests for extra mayo got a smear on the top and bottom buns. A rare few customers insisted on extra extra extra mayonnaise. Ludicrous volumes of mayo. I always asked them if they were sure, informing them it was going to be a lot, probably too much. Informed consent and all. I made something special for these misguided souls: the mayo trough.

    They'd get the standard extra mayo smear on the bottom bun, but the top bun was where the magic happened. I'd press a concavity into the inside of the bun, completely fill it in with mayonnaise (a foot long sandwich took about 1/3 cup), then gently nestle it atop the fillings. When they'd bite into their sandwich, they were rewarded for their foolishness by it spurting mayonnaise and other condiments everywhere, like a culinary Peter North unloading into a roast beef sandwich.

    We didn't get a lot of repeat requests.

  • Does anyone actually have home safes or does everyone just use bank safes? (or do you hide stuff under your mattress?)

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  • Probably, but it's the good ol' cost-benefit analysis. It'll survive so much longer than if it wasn't protected at at all, but the next-level fire protection that would increases its chances is really expensive.

  • Does anyone actually have home safes or does everyone just use bank safes? (or do you hide stuff under your mattress?)

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  • That's exactly what I'd recommend! The contents will crisp long before a quality silicone bag will.

  • Linux @lemmy.ml
    SoleInvictus @lemmy.blahaj.zone

    Update: I did it! Old: Help! Installing Linux with no external media.

  • retrocomputing @lemmy.sdf.org
    SoleInvictus @lemmy.blahaj.zone

    VIC-20 cassette stash - what's worth backing up?

  • Linux @lemmy.ml
    SoleInvictus @lemmy.blahaj.zone

    Linux Mint - Can't get Dolphin to work properly with network files

  • Asklemmy @lemmy.ml
    SoleInvictus @lemmy.blahaj.zone

    What are your notable stories of selling or giving away things online?

  • Mildly Infuriating @lemmy.world
    SoleInvictus @lemmy.blahaj.zone

    People who poop with the bathroom fan off

  • You Should Know @lemmy.world
    SoleInvictus @lemmy.blahaj.zone

    Right-to-Work Laws don't mean your employer can fire you at any time for any reason (US Law)

  • Linux @lemmy.ml
    SoleInvictus @lemmy.blahaj.zone

    Halp! Calibrating touchscreen on Panasonic CF-30