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Posts
17
Comments
243
Joined
2 yr. ago

Older millennial nerd.

  • In middle school, a kid got caught masturbating in study hall. I never saw him again after that. Word was that he moved away out of embarrassment. Parents probably just home schooled him or something.

    In a completely different direction, my class broke the "suicide school" moniker. We were the first graduating class in like 10 years to not have a suicide.

  • Who checks notes cares?

    I honestly thought they went out of business. The only one I might see on a regular basis closed and I didn't see any on a recent short road trip. Whatever, their food was mediocre anyway.

  • I had a Chevy Caliber named Ex.

  • Pee-wee's Big Adventure. Damn you, Large Marge!

  • I only lose my mind over advanced calculus. That's some rough stuff.

  • For years I have said that y'all is the best thing to come out of the south.

  • "I hope you like lobster because I want to make you my Maine girl."

    Something about VerMOUNT.

    "I'm glad I have a boat because I'm about to take you to rode Island."

    "Hi, I'm from Michigan. holds up hand and points to it with the other To be precise, here. I'd like to offer you a seat. To be precise, here. points to face.

    "Girl, are you from the Midwest, because I love your cans, ass. (Kansas)"

    At a meetup for technicians: "Are we in the Lonestar state because all I see is an amazing tech's ass. (Texas)"

    "Do you have a sister named Elsa because that would make you Anna. I'm on a trip around the country and my next stop is Mount Anna."

    "I'd love to get you in a threesome, but I'm not sure about my inuit girlfriend, so Alaska. (I'll ask her)"

  • Perfect.

  • Well that certainly is where you find anal.

  • Works with vehicle models too.

    • Anal Wrangler
    • Anal Charger
    • Anal Windstar
    • Anal Ram
    • Anal Voyager
    • Anal Explorer
  • You forgot the pre-1700s picture where all of the US is red.

  • Venison, lobster, scallops, crab, and shrampies!

  • Nu!

  • I see what you did there.

  • I have house Crocs, does that count?

  • I have one of those. Banging on crap at 11pm, revving his Harley at 5am, has a rooster. Fun times.

  • My favorite rock has a first name, it's H-O-M-E-R. My favorite rock has a second name, it's H-O-M-E-R.

  • Growing up is overrated. This is gold.

  • The release of "1985" by Bowling for Soup was closer to actual 1985 than we are to its release.

  • We are those who join forces and we also burn crosses.