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TubularTittyFrog

@ TubularTittyFrog @lemmy.world

Posts
5
Comments
589
Joined
2 yr. ago

  • Why is socialization so hard in the 2020s?

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  • i do all of this. it doesn't make any difference. all it does is lead to shallow boring connections based on whining and commiserating about how life here sucks. people in the book clubs don't read the books, they also just want to whine about their lives.

    every volunteer group i join... just ends up being a group of core people who want to exclude new people for not looking/talking/thinking just like they do and jerking themselves off about how wonderful and perfect they are and then whining how they can't get new people to join them...

    I left my volunteer groups because they became so exclusivist and elitist.

  • What valuable resources are out there for men to learn about themselves?

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  • there are have been violent male incels and female incels.

    but only one of those gets media play, due to cultural sex biases.

    just like female pedophiles get a pass and male pedophiles are witch-hunted. nobody calls for the tortue and wrap of women pedophiles, weird right?

  • Is anyone else's friends getting really distant?

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  • people on lemmy are not normal people. they are ideological extremists for the most part.

  • Is anyone else's friends getting really distant?

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  • you're one person. the other 99% disagree with you.

    but yeah... its' a bullshit generalization because you disagree and apparently your opinion is somehow more valid than everyone else around who is the opposite?

    how is that working out for you?

  • Is anyone else's friends getting really distant?

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  • you sound like a fascist. should you be dead then?

  • Is anyone else's friends getting really distant?

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  • it was also easier irl.

    but the world has changed and people are way more dickish than they used to be, making connecting way harder.

  • Any bike app/community that allows posting personal information?

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  • This is witch-hunting.

  • Why are the you are the problem comments so common on Lemmy?

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  • huh? ivory tower and hipster are mutually exclusive, unless you just meant both types?

    every hipster i know hates education and academia. and i've never met a hipster academic.

    i also identify as academic and anti-hipster. and every hipster i interact with hates my academic approaches towards life.

  • Why are the you are the problem comments so common on Lemmy?

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  • i mean, that entirely depends on the particulars of the problem.

  • Why are the you are the problem comments so common on Lemmy?

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  • yep.

    IME people who embrace personal responsibility generally don't whine/complain that much. those who do so pathologically... absolutely refuse to take responsibility for themselves and angry/frustrated that other people won't do it for them.

    and the pathological people will hate anyone who calls them out. they will seek people who tell them it isn't their fault and how they are perfect as they are.

  • Why are the you are the problem comments so common on Lemmy?

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  • Yeah. That tracks. Every community I was involved with in reddit... and IRL, kind of works this way too.

    It starts with open minded plain talking enthusiastic folks, then the 'concerned' people start invading it and want to sanitize it so that it's 'inviting' to non-enthusiasts and they start policing everyone the way they police themselves. And their primary concern is not the idea or hobby, but it's presentation being as 'acceptable' to as broad a spectrum of people as possible... which ultimately makes it bland and boring to the OG people. and the OG people are 'offensive' to the new people who are only there for the 'image' of the thing. Also the diversity of perspectives disappears, as only one perspective is allowed as the 'correct' one.

    I generally prefer an environment full of outspoken people who actively disagree. Average people find such an environment hostile and they want to build a loyalty based consensus and exclude those who are disagree or are non-believers. I like the former because I learn things. I hate the latter because I learn nothing and it devolves into a circle jerk of people who want 'safety'.

  • Why are the you are the problem comments so common on Lemmy?

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  • Because most people's problems are ultimate their own responsibility. Most of us can't change the circumstances around us, but we can change ourselves.

    This is assuming the person wants to fix the issue. Many people... don't. Their misery is their identity. Personally I've had plenty of relationships in my life with people like that. I ended up leaving them, and they thought I was a selfish asshole for not fixing their issues for them, because they believed it was my job to 'adult' for them. And frankly, some people are happy to have relationships like that, where the other person is their 'child' they take care of.

    Also it's very different if say you have a car accident. A random occurrence... than if you keep getting into car accidents. That's a pattern. I've had one car accident. But people who have many accidents... it's because they are bad drivers. I once dated a woman who has 6 car accidents in 5 years. She was a terrifyingly bad driver, but in her mind it was everyone else who was the bad drivers because they were 'in her way'. and when i drove she would scream at me for being 'a pussy' because I drove safely.

  • Why is socialization so hard in the 2020s?

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  • Where I live people don't act normal in public anymore. They b asically make internet comments at each other IRL and don't really interact, at least not in the traditional way I do. I find most people find a legit conversation is 'scary and weird'. they mostly just want ot make random commentary at you, rather than talk to you.

  • Why is socialization so hard in the 2020s?

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  • Yes, I have noticed this as well. People's expectations are sky high an people are generally less grounded than they used to be. I have noticed this especially in the dating context. 10 year ago my dates were pretty chill, even if things didn't work out we could still have a good time. Now I frequently encounter people who are outright hostile to me because I I am not 'x enough' in some arbitrary category in their head, therefore i am a subhuman scum who is 'wasting' their time. I've been actively insulted and harassed on first dates by such people. It's truly bizarre.

    I agree that most people have commodified other people and it's gross and alienating. I'm not a wish-fulfillment machine.

  • Is anyone else's friends getting really distant?

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  • you're assuming you can find people that make you feel good. a lot of us can't. especially if we live in a place where our values/beliefs don't align with the dominant ones.

  • Would you try a FOSS dating app?

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  • because i can.

    just like i cam make commentary about Jeep products even though I will never buy one.

  • Is anyone else's friends getting really distant?

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  • strawmen exist in the real world yes. it drives most people's argumentation, yes.

    saying i have making a strawman arguement doesn't make the people who vote and talk this way go away. hypocritical people who say one thing, and then vote for the exact opposite policies in their communities, are very common. it's called grandstanding.

  • Locked

    Should the US have a 40% federal inheritance tax?

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  • the gift limit is 19K. above that gifts are taxed progressively.

    maybe inheritance limit should be like 100x that? so if you inherent 1.9 million you get taxed or maybe its like 190K but the tax at that value is like 1%

  • Locked

    Should the US have a 40% federal inheritance tax?

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